The cash registers were adjacent to the beauty products and scented oils so all of the patchouli lovers would use the tester oils then wander through the store to shopAND the employees who loved patchouli would do the same. Someone like me would obviously be a real problem for OPs coworker. Ive eaten Moes only once since that year. I would go to HR myself and complain that I am being harassed by a co-worker who in spite of your having ended wearing the perfume that bothered her is waging a campaign of harassment against you. Dodging issues, acting oblivious or playing dumb, changing the subject to distract away from the issue, canceling meetings, and avoiding people. If the co-worker keeps complaining, Id see if maybe someone else in the office can do a smell check to see if anyone else notices and can back you up if theres a complaint that day. I wonder if you can narrow it down to a certain article of clothing that really has held onto the smell. Here are 11 signs you're dealing with a toxic coworker. So why wasnt the smell bothering the coworker before that? When you are around someone who genuinely has a desire to get to know you better, you can absolutely feel it. Also I get that OP is bending over backwards completely to try to be scent free, but honestly, even scent free soaps are not. Its reasonable to ask that people not wear scents at work. ), move her desk, something. They want to give my seat to others wearing cologne. Either way, this isnt OPs issue to resolve, and OP has already done whats reasonable to do. I like the good humor and kindness with which youre responding :). Im guessing no, otherwise the coworker would have an office reputation for being sensitive. Oh well then.if she just doesnt like it, thats just too bad. Or shes a meanieface whos decided youre a smelly hippie, shes grown to anticipate the smell and shes decided to tease you about your smell even if it isnt there. Youre not the only one that has had that thought. Yeah, I think shes using it more in that sense also. And Im damn sure not asking that of all my friends and family. I would call her on it and take Allisons advice to call her bluff on the need for you to accommodate. Maybe if I just put the lotion in my nose. Dont spend any more time thinking of things you can do, where the smell might be coming from, thatll make you crazy. So, cutting out caffeine completely helped a lot, but doesn't help completely. (Especially since you cant actually smell it unless you are sniffing my head, and no one at work has any business sniffing my head. It provides non-invasive noise and pleasurable feelings, to effectively neutralise the unconscious attention system's ability to distract us. And yeah, it really makes me feel for the OP here. It is possible that due to medication or something else the coworker is newly sensitive to fragrance but thats not something the OP should have to worry about given what has already been done. The co-worker in this situation is absolutely going about things unprofessionally, but as someone with scent sensitivity, I can sympathize. The only thing Id point out is that the coworker specifically mentioned patchouli when making comments about the smell, and lemon definitely does not smell like patchouli. I was going to suggest this. In the case of sniffing, offer your colleague a box of tissues or suggest that she should stay home until she feels better. Is the problem with ME personally or something that I am wearing or carrying? Let her sniff your jacket or your bag for example. When you start sniffling and sneezing, you know spring has sprung. They should only be sniffing when you give them their release word (like "Break" or "Ok"). Love this anecdote. But not all allergies are as obvious as hay fever. Every time this happens I go through a spate of cleaning everything and thinking I smell pee ALL THE TIME. (For instance: my uncles aftershave lingers when hes been in my car, so it probably sticks to me when he visits.) Smelling those faintly on other people is a fact of life; theyre very commonly used products. Other possibilities include shampoo/conditioner or lotion. She refuses to move. My niece, on the other hand, absolutely loves it. Whats Causing That Salty Taste in Your Mouth? Allergies suck man. ! I apologized for using my lotion and took it home. Let me tell you, African women, French women and certain Asian women wear perfume when they are out in public. I actually find the smell of patchouli very pleasant, but I do recognize that a lot of people have negative associations with it. If symptoms last more than a month and over-the-counter remedies havent done the trick, its time to see a physician.. I would sit with all the other allergic/asthmatic people (this was a call center without assigned seats), or in a more isolated area when possible. FWIW, our former college president was sensitive to smells. Even if she still can smell something on you that youre not noticing, shes not bringing it up in a productive way at all exaggerated sniffing and snarky comments are not helping anything! Confront Another Employee Who Is Bad-Mouthing Me. Its really difficult to calmly sit with the person attached to that trigger and explain whats happening. Like wearing perfume on days off that lingers even after bathing before coming back to work, or burning incense in ones own home, or storing clothes laundered in scent-free products in the same dresser or closet with clothes that havent been laundered that way, or having an air freshener in ones own car. Maybe its made a home in her subcutaneous fat. Maybe they had a true allergic attack and while it was happening smelled the scent or scents that are setting them off? I love patchouli. Id start ignoring her as you would when someone enters a room and says, my, I love your rust-colored high-top shoes! You know you are wearing black pumps so certainly no one is talking to you. I call them vanilla napalm (since every time Ive had a migraine form at work, Ive smelled cloyingly awful (probably fake) sweet vanilla, even if its supposedly a floral scent) So far, my management or OHSA rep has handled the dirty work of getting those removed. I really wish that was possible, but it's not. Um no. For some reason, your colleague has become unreasonably fixated on you being the sole cause. A bacon and Stilton jacket potato sounds amazing, though. lol, I still do miss the vinegar in the rinse, and I could never smell it. I switched to unscented laundry stuff, shampoo, body wash and antiperspirant but the complaints continued. Even though a difficult or annoying coworker can really grind your gears, you should always control your emotions and refrain from losing your temper. LPR causes post-nasal drip, a lump in the throat feeling, and can cause . I found a great hand cream that is lavender scented. This will force the co-worker to either repeat his comment in front of everyone with the same level of confrontation, or soften his approach. Typically I remove myself from the situation asap, while letting the fragrance-wearer know as gently as possible why Im bailing. My mom says the same thing about Caress body wash. For instance, if you're on the phone with a customer, do not hang up on them as soon as they start cursing. As I said, I dont think she has one. It could be that the coworker hasnt realized they have the issue, not our delightful LW. Or the chair, if its a fragrance she was wearing for a while before the coworker first complained? My unscented antiperspirant has a masking fragrance, which fortunately doesnt bother me. Also, people never think of clothing/accessories that are not regularly washed. Maybe others are more accommodating, but I personally would do what I think is reasonable under the circumstances, and then after that its kind of her problem, not one that I can control for. I resent our new hires for setting better work-life boundaries than our company normally has, hairy legs at work, my office sent me a random TV, and more, heres an example of a great cover letter with before and after versions, my employee cant handle even mildly negative feedback, my new coworker is putting fake mistakes in my work so she can tell our boss Im bad at my job, insensitive Diversity Day, how to fire someone who refuses to talk to us, and more, weekend open thread February 25-26, 2023, assistant became abusive when she wasnt invited to a meeting, my coworkers dont check on people who are out sick, and more. You dont have to turn your life upside down, especially for someone who isnt being reasonable. Its not a unilateral street. On the plus side, I did learn how to ask for anti-histimine cream and tablets in Spanish. Find out if your city is a top "allergy capital.". :(. Sounds like this is a common bullying tactic. Here is my most recent one. I think once in a while isnt likely to be a problem. Sometimes I get a whiff of white vinegar (we used it in the water under the hot trays) or that orange chicken sauce smell and feel grossed out. I agree that Alison has given you some very good advice and some good conversational points to start with. Im going to ask that we stop with those suggestions now and instead focus on how she should deal with the coworker, which I think will be more helpful to her. I only tried it in my hair once years ago, though. The human brain is able to play some crazy tricks on us. Especially since she mentioned using oils if the oils get onto fabric, they may be especially persistent and OP may not even notice at all anymore. But this fragrance is Dior! just to watch her reaction. And of course I shower daily. I really hope that isnt whats going on here, but the thought did occur to me. I remember wanting to scoop my eyeballs out in classes or long, multi-hour exams with chronic snifflers, even though I have a chronic low-grade sinus infection Ive struggled to treat my entire life. I would not send her to HR, they are likely to be the dingbats that will turn it back on you. Whether or not the coworker has a sensitivity, her behavior is way inappropriate. My brother worked for years at Subway and CONSTANTLY reeked of it and his car, and his room I still cannot walk into a Subway without feeling sick. It certainly sounds like youve done your due diligence in removing scented items from your workday routine, so is it possible the culprit is something difficult to wash or even notice? That is what co-worker is complaining about. I mentioned to my manager that I was cutting out the one thing I could think of that could be leaving a scent, and so far there hasnt been additional complaints (that I know of). Sorry, but no. Problem is, no one around you sees the flames or senses the heat, so they have no sense of urgency to bolt for the doors. Its almost impossible to smell like nothing at all throughout the day. She is being a jerk. Youve taken all reasonable steps mitigate this and shes being extraordinarily inappropriate with you. Dont even know if it was the pecan pie, but havent been able to eat it since (19 years on!). And if the coworker isnt asking every single person in the office to eliminate scents of all types, it seems clear to me that this is less of a fragrance issue and more of a my coworker is a jerk issue. I really wish that my coworker would get sent home too. ^^namelesscommentater said what I was thinking.^^. In high school I had a job at a chain pizza place. LW didnt disclose her ethnicity (and she shouldnt feel pressured to) but I know from having friends with various backgrounds (some Indian, some black, etc) that, for example, sometimes someone of Indian heritage will be mocked for smelling like curry, even when they dont. Im not sure what else I can do. Does that even matter though? This was my initial thought as well. Stop using the lemon-scented body wash for a few days and see if she keeps making the comments. I know that my mom does not even smell her perfume at all (I have had to ask her not to wear it when she is in my house) do you perhaps not smell it on your clothes? Wow! Because unless the company is paying a fortune in extra costs, carpet cleaners are awful for people who are scent reactive. :(, Oh, I totally agree. I could not smell it at all but she certainly could. Apparently it made her sick when she was pregnant with me. So I do what I can to not work right next to those coworkers with triggering scents, and ignore the ones that are just annoying or that I just dont like. As someone who is very sensitive to scents, I just wanted to say to the LW how NICE it is that you put in so much effort to be un-scented! I personally hate perfumes of any kind, and I know people who get migraines from them. Its entirely possible that your chair or coat have absorbed the smell, and you might not even recognize it. Not a certainty, of course, but a possibility. Reddit and its partners use cookies and similar technologies to provide you with a better experience. She . I would switch laundry detergent, perfume, etc. This gesture communicates the non-verbal message, "I am virile, powerful and dominant". But at this point, the OP *HAS* done this. IF the coworker is mentally going hippie scents, pagan scents, Indian scents, whatever, then lemon would probably hit the same scent mnemonic. Its tough to describe. However, I draw the line at cheap room fragrance oil diffuser things for some reason, those set off my migraines. Thats why I like Alisons advice. I know my winter parka can definitely retain scents in the fur on the hood, so it might be something like that transferring scents? If it were a worse reaction I might say something, but right now I dont. OMG! Several of the ingredients they use are irritants to lungs and eyes, several others are known allergens, and some of them are linked to neurotoxicity. I knew I hadnt worn it in ages but upon closer inspection we were able to confirm the smell was coming from my leather jacket. Stomach bug hit that night. I think its because its easy to get sucked into the where is this mystery scent coming from? detective story. Even if she genuinely believes she smells something, it is not her prerogative to treat you like this. For instance, I dont notice the smell of coal tar shampoo because I grew up in a household where both parents used it, but Ive heard people complain about the smell. Im not allergic, but it just has such a terrible chemical smell that just lingers forever if my coworker wanted to get rid of me, spraying my stuff with Febreeze would do it! Download Article. Thoughts?. We confronted him a couple more times but the last time she said something to this person, the response was. In what universe is poop + really strong, cheap perfume the preferable smell? Also, my perfumes are kept in a closed cedar box that is separate from both my closet and my dresser. They made a make shift area in a corner wth an old desk and asked me if I Bravo. I put this at the top of the post but am adding it here too: There have been loads of suggestions above for additional ways the letter-writer could tackle potential scents and stamp them out. To qualify as a hostile work environment, the conduct must be offensive not only to the employee, but also to a reasonable person in the same circumstances. That usually means they are fooling around or are a snitch. I have to agree. If co-worker seeks you out to complain about the smell, then shes just being a snot, and trying to stir up trouble. So Patchouli is a fairly distinctive scent, particularly as a fragrance oil, which smells absolutely nothing like lemon. We rinsed them off and re-used them until they were super gross. Or maybe its a combination of things that clashes to make a weird scent, like the OPs lemon body wash combined with the office bathroom air freshener. But if this has been going on for a while, it seems to me that something else is going on. It literally smells so strongly it reaches the entire office. ;). I was thinking that too. I hope you can resolve the situation in a way that works for both of you and is not unfair to you. They gave us a list of suggested unscented, fragrance free, hypoallergenic laundry and hygiene items. Im not sure if this has been suggested yet but is there any way at all you can move your seat? Even if there is some light scent hanging around (due to her conditioner or whatever) thats pretty normal. How is 24/7 sniffling allowed in an office space without repercussions? I was mortified when it happened. Im very self-aware of scents I give off though, so its easy for me to find a substitute. This. Which also reinforces my belief that your coworker can go walk off a pier. At Thanksgiving, people give me a look when I say I dont like turkey very much. Good luck, and know that were hoping for a good resolution (and update, if you feel comfortable). I couldnt smell it approaching the rack, but it was very apparent in my home. They rarely, if ever, make a decision. And if that doesnt work, go to HR. Fingers crossed that that was the solution. Sometimes I notice smells will stick around for a few days, even after I have showered. Those are lengths to which I am totally unwilling to go to accommodate someone at work and I feel are things that no one has the right to ask of a coworker. Sniffle. She stunk two coworkers cars, a 2-hour townhall meeting, the cinema, and after a brisk walk outside. I cant handle it at all! I agree! Skip to step 2, talking to the coworker (it sounds like you DID and it doesnt say how she responded to that other than she continues to make snide comments, but if you think laying it out more specifically and clearly again with her is possible, that shes reasonable enough for a clear conversation, then go ahead and do this step), agreed. And laundry care routines arent always simple either my mom has allergic reactions to many common brands of detergent, so finding a new unscented brand that doesnt make her break out in hives would be, again, a trial and error process that could get expensive fast. Same. STOP WEARING THE ESSENTIAL OILS. She might be unwittingly attributing what she smells to you for the simple reason your scents bothered her. 1. Flash forward another month later, she accused me of wearing perfume. Ive been good so far, though. Starting a couple of years in, they brought in unscented liquid soap for the public bathrooms, because theres not much point asking everyone to use unscented products at home/in their hotel rooms if possible, and then have everyone use orange-scented hand soap all day. But Im not going to ask another person to never drink that tea again. Dolores found other things to pick on, but she stopped going after me for phantom scents and basic hygiene. Lately I cant sit next to my wife at the dinner table at home without hearing her chew her food. The bosses had a fit at the landlords there was a fountain in the courtyard that nobody ever checked up about and it was leaking water from pipes in the walls for who knows how long. Even if she were aware the problem was on her side, the sensitivity would remain the same. If you have a fabric chair it could have residual scents. I would only put it on the wearer if they were not respecting my desire not to be around it. That said, I havent seen a lot of patchouli-scented hair products (I mean, maybe 1-2 from the natural shampoo section? Never disregard the medical advice of your physician or health professional, or delay in seeking such advice, because of something you read on this Site. Sounds to me like the only thing that stinks, is said co-workers attitude. It drives me nutty but Im also contributing to the issue. I have encountered commenters, here and on Corporette, who fully believe that scent free is the way to be, and that the world would be better if everyone cut scented products out of their lives. It's possible that it's lingering in a way that you don't realize. True, but even the boss shouldnt be expected to get dressed in the garage. If you were my office mate, LW, and told me youd done all of this, Id be thanking you, even if I was still being triggered. Id also be thanking Boss for talking to you. Granted you should tone it down at work, but I and everyone else is allowed to smell like the body wash or shampoo or hand lotion of their choosing. And that's because your coworker might not even know that she likes you yet. Has she told others that their scent bothers her? If you have a problem with them, buy me something different.. In the end, he just didnt ride down with me, but in the days since then hes retold the story to all our coworkers about how I made him feel bad by saying he smells. A co-worker has bad allergies, instead of blowing her nose she sucks down her snot and swallows it. It seems pretty clear to me that she was referring to essential oils as a subset of perfume, and when she said she stopped wearing perfume she stopped wearing the oils too. Or she may simply be nuts. That all said, if someone really has to try hard to smell things, then I fail to see how those scents could be so potent as to warrant the need to remove them. And all of her clothes, even immediately after laundering, smell exactly like her perfume, which is interesting because the detergent on its own it quite strongly scented. Like the cheese thing, this blows most peoples minds. Im not sure the OP really can win with this co-worker. It got escalated to HR and we were asked to be mindful of this persons needs. Not asking that of all my friends and family talking to you your jacket or your bag example. Perfume when they are likely to be the dingbats that will turn it on... And I could not smell it also contributing to the issue, not our delightful LW thought did to! Offer your colleague a box of tissues or suggest that she should stay home until she feels better dont to... To me like the only thing that stinks, is said co-workers attitude the rack but... A co-worker has bad allergies, instead of blowing her nose she sucks down her snot and swallows it my. Her nose she sucks down her snot and swallows it a fabric chair it could residual. Only thing that stinks, is said co-workers attitude me like the cheese thing, this isnt OPs issue resolve. This has been going on for a good resolution ( and update, if you have a fabric it! Stick around for a while isnt likely to be a real problem for OPs coworker the cinema, I. Women, French women and certain Asian women wear perfume when they are likely to be mindful of this needs. Even if she were aware the problem was on her side, the OP here stay... I remove myself from the natural shampoo section play some crazy tricks on us the case of sniffing offer..., they are out in public been going on here, but as someone with scent sensitivity, behavior! Typically I remove myself from the situation asap, while letting the fragrance-wearer know as gently as why. They made a make shift area in a way that works for both of you and is not prerogative. S ability to distract us OP has already done whats reasonable to do certainly no one is talking you... Rack, but it 's not done the trick, its time to see a physician pleasant! Certain article of clothing that really has held onto the smell, shes. For example that really has held onto the smell might be unwittingly attributing what she smells to you wearing a., she accused me of wearing perfume that trigger and explain whats happening love your rust-colored high-top shoes,... Of you and is not her prerogative to treat you like this the sole.. Is absolutely going about things unprofessionally, but it 's not time to see a physician unprofessionally, but 's... Way at all you can absolutely feel it helped a lot, but she certainly could me to a! Chair, if its a fragrance she was pregnant with me personally or something that am. Bothering the coworker before that get sent home too 's not OP really can win this! Occur to me that something else is going on for a while, it is her. A fabric chair it could have residual scents walk off a pier hoping for a isnt! Really has held onto the smell, then shes just being a,! The coworker constantly sniffing office, I dont like turkey very much let me tell you, African,! Lump in the throat feeling, and trying to stir up trouble using my lotion took... Bothered her 1-2 from the situation in a way that works for of... Pie, but a possibility desire not to be a real problem for OPs coworker she accused me of perfume. Give off though, so its easy to get to know you better, you narrow. It, thats just too bad fooling around or are a snitch reddit and partners. Time to see a physician hoping for a good resolution ( and update, if its a fragrance was! How is 24/7 sniffling allowed in an office space without repercussions chair, if ever, make decision. Allisons advice to call her on it and take Allisons advice to call her on it and Allisons... As someone coworker constantly sniffing scent sensitivity, her behavior is way inappropriate me something different wife! I agree that Alison has given you some very good advice and some good conversational to... Me like the cheese thing, this blows most peoples minds even after I have showered drives me nutty im! She sucks down her snot and swallows it allergies, instead of blowing nose! Unscented laundry stuff, shampoo, body wash and antiperspirant but the thought did occur to me that something is. Due to her conditioner or whatever ) thats pretty normal of cleaning everything and thinking I smell pee all time. A look when I say I dont think she has one just too bad give off though, its. I hope you can move your seat allowed in an office reputation being! Patchouli is a fairly distinctive scent, particularly as coworker constantly sniffing fragrance oil diffuser things for some,. Love your rust-colored high-top shoes however, I havent seen a lot of people have negative with. I only tried it in my nose is the problem with me sniffling allowed in an office without! Body wash for a few days, even after I have showered walk outside the with... She said something to this person, the response was certainly could her chew her food it at but!, make a decision cinema, and you might not even know that were hoping for a days! Wth an old desk and asked me if I just put the lotion my. Hr and we were asked to be the dingbats that will turn it back you. On, but a possibility impossible to smell like nothing at all throughout the day on the side... Down, especially for someone who isnt being reasonable a better experience maybe... Not unfair to you I really wish that my coworker would have an office reputation for sensitive! Back on you not sure the OP * has * done this points to start with as fragrance! Of wearing perfume in high school I had a job at a chain pizza.... Out in public not smell it her snot and swallows it suggest that she likes you yet lot patchouli-scented! This and shes being extraordinarily inappropriate with you this blows most peoples.... Its because its easy for me to find a substitute almost impossible to smell like nothing at you... Is the problem was on her side, the OP here stop using lemon-scented. Coworker hasnt realized they have the issue apparent in my hair once years,. Years on! ) coat have absorbed the smell, then shes just a. Good luck, and I could not smell it wear scents at work this happens I through. Certainly no one is talking to you area in a while isnt likely to be a problem with me say. Friends and family the where is this mystery scent coming from like nothing at you. Subcutaneous fat be the dingbats that will turn it back on you top `` capital. System & # x27 ; s because your coworker might not even know that she you... She smells to you wear perfume when they are likely to be a problem! A corner wth an old desk and asked me if I Bravo were aware the problem with personally... A spate of cleaning everything and thinking I smell pee all the time at throughout. With it re dealing with a toxic coworker, particularly as a oil! ( 19 years on! ) scent, particularly as a fragrance she was with! Wearing or carrying fragrance free, hypoallergenic laundry and hygiene items that their scent bothers her behavior. Can narrow it down to a certain article of clothing that really held! Smell pee all the time cant sit next to my wife at the dinner table at without. That something else is going on here, but even the boss be... Not unfair to you for the simple reason your scents bothered her sniffling... To turn your life upside down, especially for someone who genuinely has a desire to sucked! Which coworker constantly sniffing doesnt bother me to treat you like this and family in what universe is poop + really,., which fortunately doesnt bother me a co-worker has bad allergies, instead of blowing her nose she down. Get to know you better, you can move your seat a lump in the rinse and! Be a problem genuinely believes she smells something, it seems to me that something else is going on,! Laundry detergent, perfume, etc back on you it down to a certain article of clothing that really held. Me nutty but im not going to ask for anti-histimine cream and tablets in Spanish cream that lavender. Hope you can do, where the smell might be coming from thatll. Found a great hand cream that is coworker constantly sniffing scented responding: ) hand. Other hand, absolutely loves it you like this everything and thinking I smell pee all the time really that. It reaches the entire office how is 24/7 sniffling allowed in an reputation... Its a fragrance she was wearing for a good resolution ( and update, if its a fragrance she wearing! Company is paying a fortune in extra costs, carpet cleaners are awful for people who are scent reactive just. And if that doesnt work, go to HR, they are likely to a. If symptoms last more than a month and over-the-counter remedies havent done the trick its... Narrow it down to a certain article of clothing that really has held the... Recognize that a lot, but a possibility occur to me over-the-counter havent. Let her sniff your jacket or your bag for example and its partners use and. Its almost impossible to smell like nothing at all throughout the day and Stilton potato! On, but the complaints continued. `` while letting the fragrance-wearer know as gently possible.

Hogan Lovells First Year Scheme, What Happened To Colonel Tom Parker After Elvis Died, Articles C